187, 100 pounds later

It’s pretty surreal, to be honest. I remember when I decided to lose the weight. It wasn’t like a lightning bolt kind of moment when everything changed. It was a normal day. We had moved across the country from the northeast to the southwest a few months before. We had sold my boyfriend’s weight lifting equipment and talked about joining a gym. Then one day we went to visit one. It was nice, close, and pretty cheap so we signed up. And that’s how it started.

One of the first things I did at the gym was weigh myself. I hadn’t weighed myself in at least a year. I didn’t know what to expect, but I knew it wasn’t going to be pleasant.

287 pounds. That is the heaviest known weight I have ever been or will ever be.

A few days later I was looking for a website to help me count calories. I signed up for myfatsecret.com. I entered my weight. And then it asked me for a goal weight. I remember contemplating this and knowing that if I was going to lose the weight and make myself healthy, it was going to take a long time. I wondered if I could stick with it. I wondered if I would be able to change my habits. I wondered how miserable it was going to be.

The only way to find out was to try. I entered 180 pounds as my goal weight. Not really necessarily expecting to ever get there. It was a nice round number so distant from my initial weight it was more of a nebulous dream than a concrete goal.

And now I am 7 pounds way. I have lost 100 pounds and I didn’t know I could do it until I did it. And it wasn’t miserable. It has quite frankly been one of the best experiences of my life. I feel so empowered by it. I did this. I stuck it out. I changed. I was brave and I took a good hard look at myself and my habits. What I saw was bad, but it wasn’t unfixable. So I fixed it.

I am not going to gain the weight back because I am different now.

As momentous as it is to lose 100 pounds, it is nothing compared to what I have gained in terms of my physical health, my overall confidence level, my mental health, and my ability to deal with life and its inevitable stresses. And even more than all of that, I have learned finally to accept myself and love myself, flaws and all.

8 thoughts on “187, 100 pounds later

  1. I started this journey 10-1/2 weeks ago after giving up on myself many times. I am tired of being tired, of being the fat friend, of not feeling good, of being depressed, of sitting and eating junk out of boredom/loneliness/habit. I don’t completely understand why I have been able to make the mental shift this time and create this new lifestyle without much of a struggle, but I can say for sure that reading posts from people like you who are doing it is encouraging and inspiring. I’m so glad my mom offhandedly mentioned Fat Secret! I started at 282 on 4/23/10 and am down to 260. I’m setting small goals, eating what my friends and I call “food made out of food”, moving more, and keeping myself accountable by sharing what I’m doing with, well, pretty much everyone. Wait a minute–I started this comment to congratulate and thank you and have only talked about myself! Anyway, I think it’s great that you have been one of the people putting a real face on the success that is waiting for me/us if we learn to take care of ourselves in the longterm. Congratulations and thank you!

  2. Congratulations! You have accomplished great things. Best of luck for the future, stay healthy, and keep writing.

  3. Hey K8yk, it took me awhile but I discovered your blog. (your book) this is going to be great inspirational reading material for me. Thanks! TOWANDA!

  4. OMG….thank you so much for your story. You are singing the song I want to sing. Living in the southwest myself and have been making excusing about the inability to walk because it’s so dang hot! Well no more excuses are think this journey has to be difficult. You have just confirmed what I am feeling. Well done my dear!

  5. Hooray, I have your blog in my favorites now. I never really got into the Forum posts and personally don’t need to get into the DRAIN. I believe you made a great decision and I appreciate you letting me know how to follow your Blog. TOWANDA!!

  6. P.S. I am grateful for the time you did spend in the DRAIN, as I don’t know if I would have found you as a buddy if you didn’t put yourself out there. Towanda!!!

  7. Hi! Just wanted to say how inspiring reading your blog is. You’ve really encouraged me to get started on my weight loss journey.
    Kate =)

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